A Pastor’s Plea to Christian Parents: “Will You Fight for Our Young People with Me?”
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This essay comes from the heart of a pastor as a passionate plea to parents out of our shared concern for our covenant children. Some of the biggest challenges in ministry come from inside the church, particularly for parents between the ages of 45–60. There is one issue that has produced the struggle: their young people are leaving the church. Many parents have watched for years the same old story happen over and over. As soon as a young person returns from college, that child shows little to no interest in attending church. This is a source of frustration and even grief for Christian parents. I share that concern.
Challenges come to the church from inside as well as outside.
In response, parents are sometimes tempted to blame the church for the way their children now view the church. Desperate to find a way to attract their wandering children, worried parents demand the church to change in some way to attract and retain their young people. This move, church-blaming, creates an unhappy environment of disgruntlement and embarrassment along with the pressure to offer a consumer-driven Christianity. Worried parents, however, sometime give little thought to how they themselves may have contributed to the problem.
Here are five ways a pastor is committed to your children.
Here are five ways I commit to fight for the youth of our church. With God helping me,
I will love your young people enough to preach the whole counsel of God to them. I am committed to God’s word and I will tell them the whole truth.
I will call your young people to repentance and faith. This won’t be easy. Some who have yet to profess their faith will not like to be told they are wrong. The law will hurt. Some may get angry at the stances I am called to take. It may at times seem like we’re losing the battle, but I’m committed to this fight for your young people.
I will make known to them the riches of Jesus Christ and his gospel. They will never be left without a way of escape from judgment. I want them to enjoy Christ and his forgiveness and live in his peace.
I will stand for truth and expose error. I will not pander to sinful desires for false worship and golden calves. We live in day when people do not like to see a minister saying that anyone or anything is wrong, but I promise to tell them what is wrong and who is wrong (as the inspired New Testament authors did) to protect them from the path of hell.
I will pray for your young people. The battle for your children is one that must be fought with prayer. My door is always open for you to come to my study and pray with me for them.
Worried Christian parents can join in the spiritual fight for their children in these five positive ways.
Here are five ways parents can join in the spiritual fight for their children to help stop the trend of young people leaving the church:
Bring them to church and show a delight for the gospel. If you truly believe that the preaching of the gospel is the power of God to save those who believe (Rom 10:13–18; Heidelberg Catechism 65), then do all in your power to have your children in worship at a very young age. Do not let them leave to children’s church. Train their minds to listen a sermon. It is God’s way of grace to them. They must learn and see from you where the true power of God is found, in the Word. Hold it high, and they will too.
Speak well of your pastor and leaders. Great damage is done when you speak evil of the church, the pastor, or the leaders before your children. If you want them to have a positive view of the church, you must show them one. Please realize that before disgruntlement often comes a refusal to accept God’s word. A disgruntled and complaining spirit is a certain recipe to drive your children out.
Be willing to tell your children the truth and call them to repentance through loving discipline. Too many parents are scared of their young people and let them do whatever they want to do. You are responsible to discipline them and speak the truth to them in love. There is right and wrong—teach them both. If you stand for nothing, so will they. Why then would you expect them to stay in church?
Be an example to them in life of what it means to be godly. J.C. Ryle commenting on Lot’s worldliness says, “Lingering parents seldom have godly children. The eye of the child drinks in far more than the ear. A child will always observe what you do much more than what you say.” Be an example to them in doctrine and in life.
Train them and pray for them. This means gathering at the table to catechize and pray for them before their ears. It also means praying that God would give them new life by his sovereign Holy Spirit. How many people are bringing your child’s name in prayer to the throne of grace? What a tragedy if God never hears from you about the salvation of your children.
So dear parents, I made a commitment to fight for your young people. Will you?
Related Articles:
4 Practices for Being Faithful Stewards of Little Eternal Beings
Welcome Interruptions: The Discipline of Instructing Your Children
7 Parenting Errors That Can Influence Adult Children to Leave the Faith
One Tip for Getting Your Children to Pay Attention in Church
Recommended:
Core Christianity: Finding Yourself in God’s Story by Michael Horton
This article is adapted from “I Will Fight For Your Young People. Will You? A Pastor’s Plea to Christian Parents” at agradio.org.