3 Attributes of a Christian Man
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What is unique about a Christian man? What separates him from other men? In a word, love. But what kind of love—what is the love of a Christian man?
1. A Christian man's love is grounded in the love of God.
First John 4:19 says, “We love because he [God] first loved us.” The love of a Christian man is rooted by faith in his Savior Christ Jesus. Apart from Christ there is no true love, but what is the nature of true love—what does it look like, what does it do, and how can you tell? The love of a Christian man is sacrificial, just as Jesus' love for his people was sacrificial. John writes in his first letter,
By this we know love, that he [Jesus] laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. (1 John 2:16)
In the book of Ephesians Paul writes,
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. (Eph. 5:25)
In a marriage with a Christian man, it is the man who is specifically called to love sacrificially—to give up himself, his own wants and desires—for the benefit of his wife. The love of a Christian man focuses on others, cares for others, and benefits others. It is sacrificial.
2. A Christian man leads his family.
With Christian love as the foundation, a Christian man leads his family by providing for them, setting a godly example, and teaching them through words and actions. In 1 Timothy 5:8 Scripture warns men not to neglect their families but instead to take care of them. Humanity was designed by God for work; just as God works, we work because we are made in God’s image. A Christian man who is able works in order to provide a home, food, and other needs for his family.
The work that a man does is one way of setting an example of leadership for his family; it serves to show his family the loving traits of a Christian leader—his sense of responsibility and care for others. Leading also means teaching. Ephesians 6:4 encourages fathers to rear their children “in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” This means fathers must know the Lord's instruction—they must know the word of God and pass it on to their children.
3. Christian men lead in the church as they are called by God and given gifts from the Lord.
God has declared that only men are to serve in the offices of the church as pastors, elders, and deacons (1 Tim. 3:1-13; Tit.1:5-9). Especially in the first letter to Timothy and the letter to Titus, God, speaking through Paul, is very specific about the attributes of a Christian man who is called to be a leader in Christ's church. He is to be above reproach and the husband of one wife. His children are believers, respectful, and well-behaved. He is to be humble, in control of his emotions, not greedy, and of course, not an alcoholic.
A Christian leader opens his home with hospitality and sets the example of Christian holiness and self-discipline. He is trustworthy and knows the word of God well-enough to enable him to teach the Bible and to correct those who contradict it. He should not be a new convert to the faith but instead should demonstrate his godly leadership abilities by managing his own household well and having a good reputation with others, even those who are outside of the church.
These are a few of the traits of a Christian man and leader. Christian men must never lose sight of God's love, which is the source of any love and sacrifice a Christian man makes for the benefit of others—especially his own family. And though the traits of a Christian man who fills a leadership office in the church are specifically aimed at pastors, elders, and deacons, they are also attributes which all Christian men should strive to attain by the grace of God and the power of the Spirit. For God is pleased when his love flows through godly Christian men to his family and the family of faith.
This article originally appeared in BCL’s May 2021 monthly newsletter “The Uniqueness of Christian Men.”
